The Republican VP Gamut

Instapundit posted a poll "Who Should McCain pick for VP." I thought I'd review the list of potentials, such as they are.

Hillary Clinton, Joe Lieberman or any other Democrat

Let's dispense with this one first. In a word: please. In two words: come on. It just isn't serious. The day a Republican candidate nominates a Democrat for VP will be the day the Republican Party ceases being a serious political party capable of electing anybody.

Tim Pawlenty

Who?

Tom Ridge

I can hear it now: Orange Alert! Orange Alert! That's what every Democrat will scream at him everywhere he goes. Don't get me wrong, I feel for the guy, I'd never want to be the head of Der Homeland Security Department, and he probably did as good a job with HS as could have been done all things considered. But although  Ridge may be decent and somewhat capable, along with McCain they would be the Tighty Whitey Ticket. If McCain chooses Ridge we might as well just swear Obama in and not bother with an election.

Bobby Jindal

Thank God Bobby Jindal doesn't want to be VP. Bobby Jindal will one day be President, and he knows it. And when he's sworn in, President Jindal will be younger than Obama is now. But right now he's got big messes to clean up in Louisiana, and that's his ticket to the top. If he can fix Louisiana (my beloved home state), he can fix anything, and America will eat him up with a spoon.

Mitt Romney

Mitt did come in second, and he is not a totally unsubstantial politician. Still—and I mean no personal offense toward Romney—his problem is that he comes across as an insincere, plastic McCandidate, which is why his negatives are so inexplicably high in spite of spending massive personal funds to advance his name recognition during the primaries and his relatively uncontroversial past. If McCain picks him, they'll be lucky to get 150 electoral votes. Of course it would help if Romney had a compelling history or agenda, but he has neither; he's just another super-rich guy who wants to be President for some reason.

Condoleeza Rice

I love Condoleeza Rice, and believe she would make a better President than the whole lot of them, but the fact is she has Bush stink all over her, and if McCain were to pick her it would be a Christmas present to all of those democratic jerks that go around calling McCain "McSame." So far the charge hasn't been able to stick to McCain, but if he were to pick Rice it probably would. Which is a shame, especially considering how Russia is rearing it's ugly head. Rice has forgotten more about Russia than McCain or Obama will ever know. Does Bush stink wash off? Unfortunately I have no idea. We'll have to wait four years or so to find out.

Rudy Giuliani

Rudy would be an excellent choice. Before Iowa he was consistently polling not just as the strongest Republican but also as the most liked candidate of either party. So long as he doesn't bring along any of the idiots who managed his campaign, He'd give McCain FL and possibly NY. Out of all of the old white guy picks, Rudy is head and shoulders above everyone else.

Sarah Palin

If McCain were to choose Palin this election would actually turn out to be fun. Imagine that for a moment: a fun presidential election. It would be a ballsy pick, and even though voters are quite inclined to accept a certain amount of greenness in vice presidential candidates anyway, the Dems snuffed their opportunity to criticize her relative inexperience by nominating Obama as their candidate, who has even less. Her youth and vigor, her Alaska tough and her gun rights cred would highlight everything appealing about American conservatism without bringing along all of the religious fundamentalist social conservatism that creeps out independents so much. And she's a super-mom. If she were to nonchalantly unbutton her blouse and nurse her infant son in the middle of the VP debates without missing a beat about how we need to drill, drill, drill for oil in Alaska and elsewhere, Obama would be lucky to win even Illinois come November. There would finally be a prototype of a strong conservative woman that was more positive than Ann Coulter or Phyllis Schlafly.

Even though Rudy would help McCain in New York and Florida and Ridge could help in Pennsylvania, Palin would help McCain be competitive everywhere. There's women in all fifty states.